After A Trifecta Of Spankings by Two Federal Judges, Buffoon Lawyer Christian Poland Asks Federal Court Judge, “Thank You, Sir. May I Have Another?” 

It’s very rare for Federal judges to spank lawyers. However, buffoon lawyer Christian Poland seems to like it. Unfortunately, it’s not the kinky femdom spanking most sexually repressed men like Christian Poland want and can’t get.

It’s the bad kind of spanking that all attorneys fear. Yes, the ones that can only come from federal judges. Christian Poland must like feeling those paddles of justice. Two different judges have spanked Christian Poland three times in a month and a half. So. he must like it. Yet, there could also be another possibility. 

The Lionel Hutz wannabe lawyer appears to be on the verge of a mental breakdown. After reviewing at least a half dozen of his recent histrionic filings, it’s clear that Poland has lost his sanity. Federal judges are no dummies. They see the Illinois lawyer sinking into madness and they are not tolerating it. This why this self-proclaimed “skilled federal litigator” keeps getting spanked by federal judges.

Two Illinois federal court judges, Jeffrey Cole and Steven Seeger have also gone on record admonishing this “Super Lawyer.” Judge Cole even admonished Poland in February, 2025. Judge Cole called out Poland for his unethical conduct of harassing MFI-Miami lawyers with frivolous filings and late night emails. 

The Timeline Of Federal Judges Treating Buffoon Lawyer Christian Poland’s Buttocks Like A Bongo Drum

Spanking #1:

On January 14, 2025, Federal Magistrate Judge Bruce Reinhart was first to give the self-proclaimed biclopic lawyer a swift paddling.

Here’s what happened. Poland had filed a motion on behalf of his client, Romspen Investment Corporation. Poland was seeking sanctions and protective order against MFI-Miami founder Steve Dibert. 

The crybaby lawyer was not happy that Dibert filed a bar complaint against him for UPL with the Florida Bar.

Dibert then blasted out a press release about the complaint when the Florida Bar began an investigation. Although, the Florida Bar sided with an earlier ruling from Judge Reinhart. Reinhart ruled that Poland could still participate in the Florida case because his new colleague was based in Florida. 

Christian Poland filed the motion because Bar rules prevent lawyers from suing people for filing Bar complaints. Unfortunately for Poland, Judge Reinhart denied idiotic and histrionic motion. 

Spanking #2

On October 25, 2024, Poland filed a “Motion for Miscellaneous Relief” in Federal Court in Chicago. Why? Simply to harass MFI-Miami’s lawyers and commit lawfare against MFI-Miami and Dibert and drive up their legal bill. After all, Poland and Romspen know if this goes to trial, Romspen will lose. 

In January 2025, Dibert filed a second Bar complaint against Poland. This time on his home turf of Illinois. Dibert alleged that Poland was borderline psychotic and was harassing MFI-Miami’s fantastic female lawyers. Poland spammed and email bombing them with 25 late night emails a day. This led to led to the Illinois Bar launching an investigation into Poland’s conduct. 

This led to a ruling from Illinois Federal Magistrate Judge Jeffrey Cole chastising Poland for his behavior. Judge Cole also pointed out the same issues that Dibert mentioned in his complaint to the Illinois Bar. Cole also scolded Poland for repeatedly email bombing MFI-Miami’s former counsel during the Jewish High Holy Days. Poland knew she was out of the office observing the holiday.  

Spanking #3

The mentally unstable lawyer then received a second spanking from Judge Reinhart right before Valentine’s Day. 

Here’s what happened. As mentioned above, Judge Reinhart dismissed Poland’s Motion for Sanctions and Protective Order on January 14th.  The crybaby lawyer filed a motion for reconsideration along with a histrionic supplemental filing that made absolutely no sense. The only thing Poland only wrote one thing that made sense. He claimed that his involvement in this case was damaging his legal reputation.

Unfortunately for the buffoonish lawyer, that wasn’t enough to persuade Judge Reinhart. As a result, Poland received a third spanking from a federal judge. Is there fourth spanking on the horizon? 

Did MFI-Miami Founder Make Buffoon Lawyer Christian Poland Cry?

After not getting satisfaction from Judge Reinhart, the crazy Christian tried a new tactic. He filed a “Supplemental Complaint” in the federal court in Palm Beach.

Basically, the Supplemental Complaint regurgitates Poland’s histrionic rants involving Dibert’s multiple bar complaints against him. 

Poland needs to freshen up on his Bar rules. A lawyer can not sue someone for filing a Bar complaint. 

Why is Christian Poland so obsessed with Steve Dibert? Well, it appears the MFI-Miami founder has made Poland cry on several occasions. The paralegals at the Chicago office of BCLP say they have seen Poland sitting at his desk sobbing multiple times over the past several months.

Now, Christian Poland is filled with feelings of persecution that only a white Evangelical Christian man can conjure up in his heads. As a result, the psychotic lawyer believes he is now Biclops the Super Lawyer hellbent on winning a frivolous case against MFI-Miami. 

Christian Poland better be careful or could find himself on the receiving end of another spanking!

This Article Originally Appeared On RomsenRipoff.com

Christian Poland is member of the State Bars of California and Illinois. If you wish to file a complaint regarding his conduct, go to these websites:

California:

The State Bar of California

Illinois:

The Illinois State Bar Association

Also, Read More About Buffoon Lawyer Christian Poland On RomspenRipoff.com:

Romspen Lawyer Christian Poland Under 2nd Ethics Investigation

Is Lawyer Christian Poland Defrauding Romspen Out Of $20k?

Romspen Busted Conspiring With Disbarred Attorney Mark Stopa

Is Attorney Christian Poland Fighting Substance Abuse Demons?

Romspen Fixer Christian Poland Faces Multiple Bar Complaints

Romspen Attorney Christian Poland Investigated For UPL

Lawyers For Romspen Are Stuck In The Mud In Multiple Lawsuits